Just ..

Ca si cum te-as fi pierdut deja ..

Was only just the other day,
When all this felt so real,
Like nothing could go wrong,
Was like a never ending dream,
Nothing ever changed,
For so long,

But now you've gone away,
And i've tried turning the page,
And its just not the same,

But i'm breathing in,
And i'm breathing out,
I'm wide awake,
But i can't hear a sound,
Though i'm breathing in,
I can't think about,
Another you, Another me, Another now.

Where do i go from here,
I've never felt so strange,
I've never felt so torn,
Cause ever since you came my way,
I learned to live by you,
And now i'm on my own,

I know i need some time,
To leave all this behind,
Cause i'm still hanging on,

But i'm breathing in,
And i'm breathing out,
I'm wide awake,
But i cant hear a sound,
Though i'm breathing in,
I cant think about,
Another you, another me, another now.

Sitting here, all alone,
Don't wanna move, nowhere to go,
Nothing's real, just wanna hide,
Cause your not here

But i'm breathing in,
And i'm breathing out,
I'm wide awake,
But i cant hear a sound,
I'm breathing in,
And i'm breathing out,
I'm wide awake,
But i cant hear a sound,
Though i'm breathing in,
I cant think about,
Another you, Another me, Another now

Intr-o bucata de geam ..

Cand primesti totul in mana, uiti cam cat de greu e sa obtii totul singur. Tocmai de aceea cred ca si eu am uitat cum e sa cauti si sa astepti. Cum l-am primit, nu am stiut exact cat de pretios este si ghici ce .. am reactionat in cel mai jalnic mod posibil.
Ma simt aiurea acum. Pentru ca, intr-un fel, l-am .. folosit? Ei, bine, nu e chiar asa. Nu e vorba de faptul ca am nevoie de el, ci de faptul ca-l vreau. De mii de ori mai mult acum.
Pentru ca da, poate as putea trai fara el acum, dar nu as vrea. Nu vreau!
Si stiu ca asta nu mai e iubire, pentru ca eu am transformat-o intr-o obisnuinta .. Si doare cateodata, cand ma gandesc la faptul ca s-ar putea sa pierd in jocul asta.
Cateodata ma intreb daca vreau sa continui. Si stiu ca vreau, trebuie, indiferent de consecinte. Accept sa ma lovesc suficient de tare incat sa doara, atata timp cat el e fericit.
Pentru ca asta vreau: sa fie fericit. Si stiu ca eu nu pot face asta, simt ca nu e suficient.

Acasa.

Acasa`i acum.
Acum cand te iubesc.

Dupa-amiaza tarzie ..

E august.
August e intotdeauna un chin: e sfarsit de vara.
Mai sunt cateva zile si ma intorc acasa. Aceasta asa-zisa "rupere de realitate", nu a fost deloc asa ..
Prezenta mea online nu a facut decat sa-mi amplifice dorul de casa, pentru ca da, imi e dor de casa.
Printre cuvintele pe care le rostesc, cuvintele nerostite se pierd, incet, alunecand spre interior. Si mi-e teama ca intr-o zi vor exploda toate, ca intr-o ploaie. De licurici.